How do you measure a year in the life?
I wish I was more of a verbose writer so I could put in words everything that I’m feeling right now. I feel infinite and limited at the same time. I’m thinking of all the places I can go to and moments that I can experience if I don’t stay seated on this couch.
I think of my work, and how much it has placed me into a box of boredom and burned out-ness. And yet it is something so rewarding and fulfilling at the same time. It’s crazy how I feel two conflicting feelings about many things in my life.
Another year is coming to a close and the moments of my life in 2012, like short clips in a movie started running in my head. My graduation, the first day of work, the worst breakup, the trip to Boracay, the best surprise I had, all the family gatherings and the inside jokes and the all the moments that I cried so hard I fell on my knees and the moments where I laughed so hard I almost cried.
It’s indeed a crazy year and all I can say is that I’m truly blessed that God has given me another 525,600 minutes. It’s a mysterious thing—life. We all try to figure it out; why we go through the motions over time as we get old and gray—and I am just so thankful that God has revealed Himself to me and has given me a heart that is secure in Him alone… to the point of confidence that death isn’t something I should fear about and life is a blessing that should be offered unto Him.
thank you, both sa pumapayat ako at sa comment mo sa cover! hahaha :) sana lang totoo :))
true!:) thanks sa encouragement!:)
I’m literally dragging myself to go back to my routine. The 4-day vacation was heaven but left me in total disarray. Up to now I still haven’t made any of the 4 progress reports which are all due soon. I just want to lie down and rest.
I also wasn’t able to do a lot of my usual routines lately, that includes doing quiet time and exercising. Agh! I hate this mess I’m in.
I sometimes feel like my job is too big of a responsibility. I’m liable to the communication needs of my patients, and his/her progress greatly relies on how I do my techniques, how I feedback his/her caregivers, and how I encourage the patient. Even if I’m not a doctor, I feel like people are such a big responsibility. I’m literally connected to determining a big part of their lives which is their ability to speak.
I sometimes feel like I can’t keep up from one patient to another. I feel like there’s too many people who need me and there’s only much I can offer. I don’t hate my job, I really don’t. Not that everything’s not going well, they do. I have kids who have improved their communicating skills since I handled them from Day 1. I just really feel like I carry the burden of the whole family of the patient. I have to adjust to each need, to each personality, and connect to them in a deeper level where an entrepreneur or a businesswoman won’t.
I don’t know what lies ahead. Maybe I’m meant to be someone else in another place and another time. Maybe I’m meant to stay in this profession. Maybe having a car would eliminate all my “physical exhaustion problems”. I don’t know. I just want myself to enjoy what I really do at present and accomplish all my goals without feeling like I always don’t have enough time in my hands.
I got what I needed.
Travel. Walk. Pictures. Beach. Nature. Fun. Food. Eat-all-you can. Hotel. Spa. Relax. Massage. Shop. Clothes. Shoes. Bags. More Pictures. Road Trips. Music. Hills. Trees. Movies. Popcorn. Soft Bed. Cuddling. Airconditioner. Sleep. More sleep. Sushi. Chips. Mac and cheese. Pizza. Fries. Sleep. Museums. Historical places.
Combinations of things that I love and I want to do. Haay.
Happy break to me and to the rest!:)
husband kaagad, pwede boyfriend muna? :)) thank you. nasa anggulo anggulo lang yan. hehe.:)